The Daily Dime: a pun is a rare medium well done

This comes thanks to Gabe.

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"So, the case is going to withstand the fall, right?"

"Yes, I absolutely garuntee that it will not crack, buckle, get scraped, or even become slightly agitated." The pair stared down the enormous elevator shaft. Their "all incidences proof" saxophone case was in its final stages of pre-production. The only thing that remained was actually testing the product.

"Alright. If you say so. If anything happens to this case, my dad's gonna kill me! This thing's an antique!"

"Right, right. I know, I know. Just huck the thing down there so we can this over with." Hat, the one with the saxophone borrowed from his dad, stepped to the edge of the shaft. Leary of what was to happen next, he looked down. He looked his friend, Top, in the eye, and shrugged. Top's eyes bulged as if to say, "hurry up!" so Hat threw the case, with the sax inside, down the elevator shaft. His stomach seemed to sink at the same pace as the saxophone case. The two watched until they could see no more, and then listened. After a fall that was quicker than expected, they heard a thump. The thump was simultaneously satisfying to Top's ears, and dreadful to Hat's ears.

The pair walked down the stairs. Top made predictions about suits made of dollar bills, and eating fifties for lunch. Hat just hoped the sax made it out OK.

The pair reached the elevator doors, ground floor, and pried the door open. Top hopped down the small two foot leap, and lifted the case onto the floor. Hat helped him out of the hole.

"See? Wouldja lookit that? Not a scratch on the sucker!" Top said dusting off the knees of his slacks. "In fact, I'd be more surprised than not if that saxo-mo-phone wasn't fine!" he said.

"I certainly hope you're not surprised," said Hat, not at all sharing Top's enthusiasm. Hat's hands set to unbuckling the locks, each lock feeling like the pull of a gun's hammer.

1 bam.

2 bam.

3 bam.

4 bam.

5 bam.

The case was unlocked, and Hat took a deep breath before opening it. Top motioned quickly with his hands for Hat to go faster. Hat finally flung it open.

"Oh dammit!" blurted Hat. Top peered over his shoulder to find that the saxophone had collapsed under the force of the landing, causing it to look like a brass accordion at rest. "My dad's gonna kill me!" shouted Hat. Top put a reassuring hand around his friend's shoulder. He thought for a moment. And then said the only thing he could think of:

"You know what the worst part is?" Hat shrugged. "Now, it can only play flats."

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